48 Funny Tweets That Sum Up Remote Learning For Parents
Today is my kids' first day of e-learning, or as it's known colloquially, 'eh'-learning.
Many families are navigating the confusing world of remote learning at home amid the COVID-19 pandemic.
Here are 48 funny tweets about remote learning from parents who are riding the roller coaster of this new school year.
#1
It's called "remote learning" because of the remote chance my kids are going to learn anything.
— Ken Jennings (@KenJennings) September 4, 2020
#2
Zoom preschool is both hilarious and depressing. My 4 year old keeps unmuting himself and yelling 'I DON'T KNOW YOUR NAME! IS THIS MEETING OVER YET?'
— Alexis Diao (@meowdiao) September 2, 2020
#3
one kid in my daughter’s 1st grade class figured out how to change his background to an Amtrak and he’d yell in the middle of class “gotta go! my train is here!”
— Rupal Parekh (@rupalparekh) September 3, 2020
#4
Today is my kids’ first day of e-learning, or as it’s known colloquially, “eh”-learning.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) September 8, 2020
#5
‘Twas the night before remote schooling started and all through the house, not a creature was stirring because Mommy had given them all copious amounts of melatonin then taken triple her Xanax with a Grey Goose chaser.
— Ms. Havisham (@MissHavisham) September 8, 2020
#6
*5 yo on her kindergarten Zoom class*
Teacher: "So what do you do before joining our Zoom class?"
5yo: "My mommy hits me and says 'do good!"
Me, no make-up, bagel crumbs on my face, unexpectedly joining the Zoom class: "SHE MEANS I HIGH FIVE HER HAND!!!"
— Stay at Homies (@stayathomies) September 3, 2020
#7
5-year-old: I can’t do more kindergarten. My leg is hurting and that means my skeleton is broken.
Me: It’s just a story video on the iPad. You’re fine.
5-year-old: Maybe I can’t feel my fingers.
— Kiss my Fat Ash🍑 (@Tobi_Is_Fab) August 31, 2020
#8
Week one of virtual 1st grade is 75% showing off pets
— Molly Erdman (@erdmanmolly) August 21, 2020
#9
Current topic of Zoom kindergarten: how to raise your hand so that it doesn't get cropped by the camera.
— 💀 damned sinker 💀 (@dansinker) August 27, 2020
#10
Schools: “You are required to have your camera ON AT ALL TIMES during remote learning.”
Schools 2 weeks later after seeing countless half naked toddlers and husbands in the background: “You are now required to keep your camera OFF AT ALL TIMES during remote learning.”
— Faux Ma (@Faux_Ma) August 25, 2020
#11
Me: okay, we finally got all the school Zoom directions done and we are in class!!
Internet: I think I’ll stop working
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) September 3, 2020
#12
You can be a calm, rational person who doesn’t rage-eat potato chips before 10am, or you can be a parent of children doing online school. You cannot be both.
— Mommy Meme Jeans (@mommymemejeans) August 24, 2020
#13
2 hours into Virtual Learning Day 1.
This kid is asking to take his lunch hour early.
He's ready for the work world. We're done here.
— Becky Too Many Kids, Send Help (@beckyhas4kids) August 31, 2020
#14
Kindergarten zoom gym class punctuated by a parent saying "I'm just OVER IT" loudly over and over again and then "Oh, are you unmuted?"
— 💀 damned sinker 💀 (@dansinker) September 2, 2020
#15
One boy in my son’s first grade class raises his hand first thing every morning and tells the teacher how many days it’s been since he lost his tooth. Four days today.
— Andrew Knott (@aknott21) August 26, 2020
#16
Downloaded 87,642 new apps just to communicate with my kids’ school.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) September 8, 2020
#17
Oh, this first grade teacher says, "capeesh?"
It's going to be a long year.
— Becky Too Many Kids, Send Help (@beckyhas4kids) August 31, 2020
#18
My 7 year old’s teacher had to disable the chat function because the kids kept typing poop.
— Karine (@KarineReiter1) September 2, 2020
#19
What this third day of online school really needed was a lizard on the loose in the kitchen during class
— Andrew Knott (@aknott21) August 19, 2020
#20
Not even part of the way though day 1 of school, my 11yo has lost 2 pens, a calculator , a pencil and a notebook.
She’s been sitting at the kitchen table the whole time. How?
— Heather #BLM (@dishs_up) September 1, 2020
#21
"MOMMY, ARE YOU HOOKED UP TO YOUR MILKING MACHINE???"
and other things my kid yelled over Zoom on the first day of school.
— The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) September 1, 2020
#22
Remote Learning Log, Week 2, Day 6: Zoom ain’t workin’.
— stacia l. brown (@slb79) August 24, 2020
#23
In a virtual meet & greet with 9yo's new teacher and the sound keeps cutting out—the kids have missed maybe half of what she's said so far. She came back right as she was saying "we expect all students to use technology appropriately." lolllllll this bodes well
— Nicole Chung (@nicolesjchung) August 28, 2020
#24
“Remember, you are a generally intelligent human and passed 4th grade”
-Me to me on the first day of e-learning for my 5th grader
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) August 10, 2020
#25
My friend’s son is remote learning right now and driving her insane and she legit said, “I can’t wait until his daycare opens up again!” High school. She means his high school.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) August 24, 2020
#26
I expressed worry about 13 yo’s 4 hours per day, 4 days per week virtual schedule and he assured me that it’s fine because you don’t need to be smart anymore.
— Laurie Kilmartin (@anylaurie16) August 21, 2020
#27
Two weeks of Google Meetup/Zoom classes and I'm pretty sure my son will work on a farm before he works in an office.
— Laurie Kilmartin (@anylaurie16) September 1, 2020
#28
School supply list for virtual learning:
One box of crayons for kid
One one bottle of wine for me
Two glue sticks for kid
Two bottles of wine for me
One pair of scissors for kid
Three bottles of wine for me— ThisOneSays (@ThisOneSayz) August 24, 2020
#29
Kids: *sitting on floor*
Me: why aren’t you guys on your Zoom call?
Kids: Internet’s out
Me: Did you try reconnecting?
Kids:
Me: Did you reboot your computers?
Kids:
Me: So, you just quit for the day?
Kids: Yup
Me: *wonders if it’s too early to start drinking*— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) September 4, 2020
#30
I’d say the hardest part about remote learning is that I can no longer threaten to ground my kids from screens because honestly that was really all I had.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) September 3, 2020
#31
A boy in my son’s online first grade class told the teacher he felt like he was going to puke. The teacher said he should go to the bathroom. He held up a small trashcan. The teacher said, “Oh, well, looks like you’re ready.” And they continued on learning shapes in Spanish.
— Andrew Knott (@aknott21) August 29, 2020
#32
My friends 1st grader (who is in the same class as the kid I’m nannying) told the class her favorite part of summer was seeing a brown booby and both her mom and step dad are in the background going “tell them it’s a bird. Explain it’s a bird. It’s a seabird tell them that” 🤣
— Oh Gee, its almost halloween (@ohgeeitsdeegee) September 3, 2020
#33
We're 8 minutes into virtual learning.
There are twins in this class and they aren't allowed to be in the same room because there's too much echo.
They all tried to unmute to say the pledge of allegiance together and this is so far off the rails. Let's call it a day.
— Becky Too Many Kids, Send Help (@beckyhas4kids) August 31, 2020
#34
Love the first day of school pics of your kids with their laptops at the kitchen table and esp love the flowers strategically placed in the background but we should also get to see the pics where everyone’s losing their sh*t and screaming that everything sucks. Cause balance.
— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) September 2, 2020
#35
What wine pairs well with Common Core math?
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) August 24, 2020
#36
All the grandparents out there watching grandkids while they attend virtual schooling: now’s your chance to teach them cursive.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) August 18, 2020
#37
If a parent has two children under the age of 10 doing remote learning, how many days into the start of the school year will they start counting how many days are left in the school year?
— Julie Vick (@vickjulie) September 2, 2020
#38
Virtual school vocabulary:
Irish coffee
Mierda
Screwdriver
Rage eating
Desperation
Mojito
Time out
Exasperation— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) September 1, 2020
#39
Every high school kid on the first day of school Zoom today has a parent in the background yelling, "IS IT WORKING, HONEY? WHAT? OH, THEY CAN'T HEAR ME. FINE, FIGURE IT OUT YOURSELF THEN. BUT I'LL BE IN THE KITCHEN IF YOU NEED HELP!"
— Wendi Aarons (@WendiAarons) August 19, 2020
#40
So far my 5yo’s remote school is mostly learning how to mute and unmute which means the tradition of learning everything you need to know in kindergarten is alive and well.
— Farah Miller (@farahlearned) September 8, 2020
#41
1999 HS Graduate Brittany: Thank God I am never using math again.
2020 Virtual Learning Parent Brittany: WHAT ARE RECIPROCALS AND WHY DOES YOUR CALCULATOR HAVE BUTTONS WITH WHOLE WORDS ON IT? pic.twitter.com/5zHM0vip0S
— Brittany Gibbons (@brittanyherself) August 24, 2020
#42
My 3rd grader’s class is playing Boggle on Zoom. A girl called out a word I couldn’t hear, then said, “As in ‘human flesh,’” and now I’m frantically searching the screen for what her word is.
— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) August 24, 2020
#43
Kid’s teacher on Zoom: “Hi, Mrs. Brown! It’s nice to see you again. What lipstick is that? I love it!”
Me: “It’s not lipstick, it’s wine. I started drinking at 7am today.”
— Faux Ma (@Faux_Ma) August 26, 2020
#44
Zoom 2nd grade is fun. When my son gets bored he just closes the laptop and walks away. "Technical issues!" He yells.
— Keith Edwards (@KEdwardK) September 2, 2020
#45
My 9yo is testing the limits of virtual learning by having the dogs watch training videos on YouTube.
She said if she can virtual learn then so can they.
— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) August 18, 2020
#46
Anyone else’s 6th grader just randomly yell “WHAT THE HELL!?” Into a zoom meeting while unmuted?
Just mine? Okay.
— Heather #BLM (@dishs_up) September 3, 2020
#47
The fun thing about virtual school is my teeth gradually being ground down to powder
— Molly Erdman (@erdmanmolly) August 20, 2020
#48
My 5th grader was all pissed off the first day of virtual learning because we made her wear headphones and they obscured her dangly earrings and nobody would be able to see them during Zoom. Kill me now.
— ThisOneSays (@ThisOneSayz) August 24, 2020
Preview photo credit: erdmanmolly / twitter.com